032: Reading People through the Lens of the Personality with Anne Bogel (Enneagram 9)
When Nines are healthy and self-aware, they learn to feel special and important. They get in touch with their own passions and feel secure enough to stand behind their accomplishments. They become assertive and decisive.
But when they switch to autopilot and spiritually fall asleep at the wheel, they doubt themselves and become more pessimistic.
The deadly sin, or the passion of Nines, Sloth, is really about the failure to invest in your own self-development, in your own spiritual maturity, becoming your own person, finding your own voice, and claiming your ground. Nines need to be reminded that they matter. Nines need to do things for themselves, invest in themselves, and not feel like it's a poor investment.
In her book, Reading People: How Seeing the World through the Lens of the Personality Changes Everything, author Anne Bogel talks about being at peace with who you are. And, of course, who doesn't want that? I mean, I don't know anybody who doesn't want peace with themselves, to have a sense of consonance, a sense of integration despite all of their dings and dents. Part of the journey for Nines is learning to take action on their own behalf and invest in themselves.
One helpful way for nines to summon self-compassion and find peace with who they are is to imagine what it would be like for somebody else to experience what you are experiencing. Ask yourself, "What advice would you give someone else?" Then use that to summon the appropriate action for yourself.
Anne Bogel is the creator of the blog Modern Mrs. Darcy, the voice of the top-rated books and reading podcast "What Should I Read Next", and a bona fide personality geek. Her first book, Reading People: How Seeing the World Through the Lens of Personality Changes Everything, combines her loves of literature and personality frameworks.
To learn more about Anne Bogel visit www.modernmrsdarcy.com.
“My role is to invite people to look at familiar issues that they already know, but just shift two steps to the left, and to help them see that if you look at this familiar thing from a new angle you can see it with fresh eyes, fresh healthy eyes. My gift isn’t to come in and say, ‘This will rock your world.’ My gift is to say, ‘Let’s look at this differently.’”